Carly McKeil

warsquirtle:

Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life

(Source: wartortles, via departured)

ohdaesusie:

guys complain about girls making duckfaces while posting selfies where they’re biting their lip and squinting lookin like they’re tryna read something in size 3 font lmfao

(via sorry)

dutchster:

do twins ever realize one of them was unplanned

(via sorry)

jaydenw:

Here’s a fun april fools day prank you can do. Sneak into my room and place thousands of dollars everywhere. Just on everything. Cover my things with an insane amount of money. Make it a real hassle to clean up. The more money the better the prank.

(via sorry)